25 Christmas Ideas to Torture Your Roommate
- Claim you were a Christmas tree in your former life. If s/he
tries to bring one into the room, scream bloody murder and thrash on
- Go to the mall with your roomate and sit on Santa's lap.
Refuse to get off.
- Wear a Santa suit all the time. Deny you're wearing it.
- Sit in a corner in the fetal position rocking back and forth
chanting, "Santa Claus is coming to town, Santa Claus is coming to
- Hang mistle-toe in the doorway. When your roomate enters or
leaves the room, plant a big wet one on his/her lips.
- Hang a stocking with your roomates name on it. Collect coal
and sharp objects in it. If s/he asks, say "you've been very
naughty this year."
- Paint your nose red and wear antlers. Constantly complain
about how you never get to join in on the reindeer games.
- Make conversation out of Christmas Carols. (i.e., "You know, I
saw mommy kissing Santa Claus underneath the mistle-toe last
- Wrap yourself in Christmas lights and roll around in the snow.
- Sing: "All I want for Christmas is my roomate's two front teeth..."
- Give your roomate the gifts from the twelve days of Christmas song.
- Build a snowperson with your roomate and place a hat on its
head. When it doesn't come to life, cry hysterically "it didn't
- Whip your roomate screaming "now Dasher, now Dancer, now
Donner, and Blitzen, etc."
- Tear down all your roomate's Christmas decorations yelling "Bah
- Wake up every morning screaming "Ghost of Christmas Future,
please have mercy on my soul!" (The Lords Of Darkness apply here
- Tell your roomate you're moving out. Santa's buying you a
house on 34th Street.
- Pin a pointsetta to your lapel.
- Make anatomically correct gingerbread people and eat the best
- Put on a fake white beard and insist that all your roomate's
friends "give it a yank."
- Ring jingle bells maniacally saying "every time a bell rings an
angel gets his/her wings."
- Stand in front of the mirror reciting "How the Grinch Stole
Christmas" over and over in your underwear.
- Smoke mistle-toe. Do what comes naturaly.
- Watch your roomate when s/he is sleeping. When s/he wakes up
sing, "he sees you when you're sleeping..."
- Steal a life size nativity scene and display it in your room.
When your roommate asks, tell him/her "I had to let them stay here,
there's no room at the inn."
- When your roomate goes to the bathroom, rearrange his/her
posessions. Tell him/her that Santa's elves must have done it.