- If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.
- A conclusion is the place where you got tired of thinking.
- Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.
- For every action, there is an equal and opposite criticism.
- He who hesitates is probably right.
- Never do card tricks for the group you play poker with.
- No one is listening until you make a mistake.
- Success always occurs in private, and failure in full view.
- The colder the X-ray table, the more of your body is required on it.
- The hardness of the butter is proportional to the softness of the
- The severity of the itch is proportional to the reach.
- To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is
- To succeed in politics, it is often necessary to rise above your
- Two wrongs are only the beginning.
- You never really learn to swear until you learn to drive.
- The problem with the gene pool is that there is no lifeguard.
- Monday is an awful way to spend 1/7th of your life.
- The sooner you fall behind, the more time you'll have to catch up.
- The light at the end of the tunnel is the headlight of an